psalm 86: heart of my longing

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i’m not calling out to you any more.
no more simplistic, needy prayers.
no more pleading to you for rescue
on my day of trouble.

they say there’s none like you
but i’m starting to realize
that you’re all created
more or less the same:
jealous, imperious, possessive
and come to think of it,
pretty needy in your own right.

for so long i’ve sent out my yearning,
for too long i’ve fixated on you
and your boundless largesse,
never stopping to consider
you might really just be
a reflection of my own
inner impoverishment.

so as of now you’re off the hook.
i’m going over your head.
i’m daring to imagine
a boundless source of beneficence
yes, even beyond your own.

no expectations, no desire to fill
this bottomless well of need.
i’m sending my prayer straight into
the heart of my longing,
beyond hope, beyond desire,
for isn’t this the place
where all prayers are truly
and finally answered?

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3 Comments on “psalm 86: heart of my longing”

  1. gwpj says:

    Beautiful, and hits the nail on the head for me. Thank you so much for writing and sharing this.

  2. abunaalgodon says:

    shukran, dear psalmist. what every mystic has ever known, “a source of beneficence” way beyond the petty gods we create.


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